So, i’m a widow…

Welcome to The Polished Widow and my very first entry! Yay!

My name is Michela on the 5th February, 2011, I became a 30 year old widow & single mum. My husband was fit and healthy, when he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, 7 months later he was gone. I was literally, left holding the baby, our daughter was 12 months old.

Friends, family and even people i barely know, have complimented me on my ‘handling’ of the situation, how i remained sane and the amazing outlook & perspective on life i’ve had since.

Don’t get me wrong there were times of sadness and anger, but mostly i have been very accepting of the hand we were dealt and Nick’s death has always been something i thought ‘just had to be’. I strongly believe (God, the universe, insert whatever your belief here!) will only give you what you can handle in life.

I have a sometimes strange sense of humour, and i think this has been my way of dealing at times. I tend to use humour when I’m nervous, sad, happy, actually pretty frequently! Some people may think jokes at a funeral aren’t appropriate, i think when they are burying your husband, you get to do what you like! Nervously laugh on, i say!

In this blog, i will be documenting some of the weirder things people have said, situations that occurred and bits about my life in general, both past & present, including things ive discovered about myself along the way, like my love of nail polish, oh and my inner strength too!

Until next time, here’s a pic of me in my previous life with my husband Nick.

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I’d love this to be interactive, so please leave a comment, drop me an email, ask questions and subscribe to my blog!

Til next time, Michela x

10 thoughts on “So, i’m a widow…

  1. I stumbled across your blog by chance. I was searching other widows that have lost their husband to cancer. When I started reading I had to stop for a few days because I have never read another widows story that lost her husband from pancreatic cancer. I read today or yesterday now that time has gone by your story and it is so similar to mine with lots of differences of course. When I read how your husbands symptoms were I have never heard such similar symptoms as what my husband experienced. My husband was 43 when he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and just like you described I had no idea what that was or that we even had a pancreas or what its function was. I want to thank you for writing your story its something that i have wanted to do not just for me but for my kids and my husband. its been a little over a year now that my husband passed from this horrible cancer and reading your story has been very encouraging. Thank you!

    1. Hi Angie, firstly, im so sorry for your loss and secondly, i’m so sorry you had to also go through the motions of watching your husband suffer from pancreatic cancer, it really is like no other disease. I’m glad that my blog has provide you something to relate to, and has given you some hope. I wish you and your children nothing but happiness and positivity during your time of grieving, be gentle on yourself always.
      lots of love, Michela xx

  2. Dear Michela,
    Last week my husband received a health scare in the form of some frightening test results following a biopsy. As I work in the health industry and have seen case studies of patients with the condition he may have (we are waiting on follow up test results), I have been feeling completely immobilised with the fear I may lose him. He is 39, me 35 and we have three daughters, aged 5, 3 and 5 months. I’ve found myself up late, unable to sleep worrying how I’ll ever cope without him and imagining our girls growing up without their beautiful dad. I stumbled across your blog and I can relate so much to your realist attitude to life and your slightly ‘inappropriate’ sense of humour. Nick seemed an amazing guy, husband and father and I’m in awe of how the two of you handled all the hurdles that were thrown your way. I just wanted to thank you for writing this blog, you’ve reminded me to live every day to the fullest and also that I’m a strong, capable and intelligent woman and in the end, will cope with whatever life throws at me.
    Lots of love to you, Claudia and John,
    thank you so much,
    Fellow Melbournian x

    1. Hi there,
      Sorry for my tardiness in replying to you, buut i havent logged onto my blog in a while. How were your husbands test results? My fingers are all crossed that you received positive news. Thank you so much for your beautiful comments, you’ve made my day (on what is actually Nick’s 6th anniversary since his passing!) I’m so grateful for the message you interpreted from reading, which is exactly what I want people to understand, that you will always be ok, whatever happens and while we never want the worst case scenario, if it was to occur, it doesnt need to be the end of your world. I hope you’re still living life to the full and enjoying each minute with your beautiful family.
      Michela xx

  3. That was such a great day in the Lexus marquee. We had so much fun with you guys. Love that photo. XXX

    Some of my fondest memories of the two of you working the crowd!

    1. That day at the races, was the best last day out with Nick, it holds a special place in my heart, and we had the best company with you guys too!
      Yes, he knew how to work a room, he taught me that well! xx

  4. Michela, you are truly an inspiration and a pillar of strength, (for so many people) and we can all learn something from you. I’m so proud of you for sharing your story, for starting this blog and I can’t wait to read more. All my love xox

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